Major Life Changes
Major life transitions typically revolve around one event: divorce, retirement, becoming a parent, relocation, caregiving, health changes, career transitions, etc.
Maybe this isn’t the life you expected. And the picture you had of your future is now blurry. Or maybe you planned this transition, and what was supposed to feel celebratory now leaves you realizing how different everything will be.
Whether it is one change in a major area or several changes across the pillars of your life, you feel like you are starting over. Only now, you may be missing the energy of your youth or perhaps the confidence that came with a simpler time.
The pillars of your life that gave you stability and purpose changed…or vanished altogether. Together in therapy, we can work toward helping life feel steadier again.
Understanding Life Changes
What Happens When Life No Longer Looks Like You Expected?
You worked hard and established your life pillars carefully - professional, social, relational, physical, financial, and environmental. Then change came. Perhaps you decided to retire or made the difficult decision to end a relationship. Maybe you changed jobs or moved. Maybe several things occurred at the same time.
Or maybe it wasn’t planned. You received a medical diagnosis, your relationship ended, you were forced out of a job, or a home.
Whether planned or unplanned, the change came. The first few hits hurt but weren’t destabilizing. But before you knew it, your life was no longer recognizable. Several of the pillars you had built your life on changed, one by one.
You are somewhere between the life you used to know and the life it will become. Neither feels fully clear.
In the search for stability, you may find yourself blaming yourself or others. But no matter how much you analyze the cause, the future still looks the same – unclear. You may be wondering, “Can counseling really help?” Counseling during major life transitions can be helpful, but it takes a different shape.
Therapy Approach
What Major Life Change Therapy Looks Like with Christin
During some seasons, therapy isn't about solving the problem because the problem isn't immediately solvable. Instead, it becomes a place where your story is witnessed, your thoughts become organized, and your nervous system doesn't have to carry everything alone.
During some seasons, therapy isn't about solving the problem because the problem isn't immediately solvable. Instead, it becomes a place where your story is witnessed, your thoughts become organized, and your nervous system doesn't have to carry everything alone.
While we can't change what life is asking of you, we can often reduce the unnecessary suffering that comes from carrying it in isolation. And as the season begins to change, you'll likely discover you've been quietly changing too.
FAQs
Questions About Life Change Counseling
This is such a natural question to ask. It is easy to be concerned that you are not as strong as you should be. You might be wondering if something about you is causing the disruptions and emotions you are experiencing.
The broad answer is that there isn't one normal way to experience major life change. You are unique. Your life is unique. The losses you are experiencing are unique. Rather than measuring your experience against an arbitrary timeline or expectation, our work will examine your unique experience, understanding its impacts on you and your life.
That being said, I do pay attention to certain things. I will be looking out for other concerns that can emerge alongside major life transitions. We can recognize those patterns early and respond thoughtfully, while honoring the journey you are on.
One of the most surprising things about major life changes is that they rarely stay contained to just one area of life. You may think, "It's just a new job," or "It's just a move," or "It's just a divorce." And you are wondering why it seems to be impacting you more than it should.
Our relationships, work, finances, routines, identity, health, faith, and sense of purpose are deeply connected. When one pillar of your life changes, it often creates ripple effects throughout the rest. You may find yourself making new decisions, grieving old routines, questioning parts of your identity, and trying to adapt to a future you didn't expect.
This simply means you're adapting to a life that no longer looks the way it once did. Therapy helps organize those ripple effects, so they feel less overwhelming and more understandable. As you begin making sense of what's changed, many people find they become more confident navigating what comes next.
Life changes can come in many flavors. Often, they are things to be celebrated – getting married, retiring, having a baby, a new job, etc. With every change comes a loss – even if there is more to be celebrated. You may be surprised by the grief you experience related to that loss. You may be questioning, “This is a good thing, why am I having a hard time adjusting?” With major life change therapy, we can make the space to process the grief without it overwhelming the overall joy of the positive change in your life.
The pillars of your life are changing in more ways than one.
